I was composing my thoughts on coping skills for people who still live with their parents. I have a beef with this handout we use at work, 99 coping skills that is attributed to Boy’s Town. The trouble with it is that it is a staggering array of suggestions that will freeze anyone with either attention deficits or anxiety. It staggers between exercise and baking cookies and taking a run, being with others and seeking solitude, going to a movie or doing homework. It relies on people having some sense of what they want, which when you are in a coping crisis, is frequently buried either by the things we are struggling to cope with, or coping devices that are themselves sources of stress (addictions).
A tool for Acceptance Commitment Therapy that I really like is the Valued Living Questionnaire. It helps unknot the morass of coping skills through ranking what one values, and where one is strong. I guess I wanted to use a simpler version, and got looking at a variety of options. Then I realized I was making the same mistake of providing an overwhelming array of options.
So I’ll recommend starting with the VLQ. If you feel it doesn’t capture you, there is also Character Strengths and Virtues, which was put together by the Positive Psychology dudes. The main one I remember from when I took that was Gratitude. And then the big 5 is something I’m not a huge fan of, but it is reflected in the DSM5’s proposed model for personality disorders (though with lucidity instead of neuroticism).
Last I have a link about Acceptance Commitment Therapy for teens, because I came across it in my wanderings but it was at that point I realized I was creating another morass.